“Chronic pain” is pain that lasts for 12 weeks or more. The cause is usually nervous system misfiring, like a faulty car alarm system. Often there is no specific trigger, which makes treatment difficult. Chronic pain is common, affecting 50%–66% of adults age 50 and older. Opioid drugs are recommended for pain control in life-threatening…
Family Caregiver Blog
Dementia: safety and independence
Everyone with a memory loss condition deserves the opportunity to stay engaged in life for as long as possible. Early in the disease, your loved one will continue to do many things quite well. Your challenge is to balance respect for your relative’s independence with the need to ensure safety. All this while preserving a…
Smartwatches for seniors
The makers of smartwatches are now designing products for older adults. And they just may have come up with an acceptable alternative to the standard “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” pendant. Perhaps you’ve tried to get your loved one to wear a personal emergency response system (PERS) pendant—only to hear, “No. I don’t…
Researching treatments online
For those facing a serious—or even incurable—condition, the Internet can seem to be the last refuge of hope. But how can you distinguish a trustworthy website from that of a huckster? “Follow the money” is an important key for deciding if a website is truly unbiased. Start by asking yourself who, what, and why. Who:…
Age-friendly kitchen
Aging creates so many “new normals.” Even routine activities such as cooking may become challenging for your loved one. Balance issues can make reaching, bending, or lifting a problem. Arthritis often makes it difficult to maneuver pans and tools, turn on a faucet, or twist off lids. Extreme fatigue may sap overall motivation. And problems…
Setting limits: saying “no” nicely
Many of us were raised to believe that the only polite or kind answer is “yes.” But as Dr. Christine Carter, a UC Berkeley researcher, notes, “If you find yourself saying ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no,’ it’s a recipe for overwhelm and exhaustion.” Not to mention resentment, burnout, and ill health! Ironically, research shows that…
Conserving energy in the face of fatigue
People with congestive heart failure (CHF) often tire easily, especially if they exert themselves. In CHF, the heart is swollen with fluids and cannot beat efficiently. The body’s cells then become hungry for oxygen. If your loved one has CHF, you witness this in his or her fatigue, shortness of breath, and frequent naps. Even…
Embarrassing Behaviors
What do you do when sweet Mom starts cursing angrily? When straitlaced Dad makes off-color remarks? In persons with dementia, these behaviors are not on purpose. They are caused by the brain changes of the disease. If you can’t find humor in the situation, draw on your patience. Believe it or not, your relative is doing…
Bathing and Dementia
Bathing brings many discomforts. Bathrooms can feel cold and drafty when a person is wet. And running water can be noisy. Nudity makes bathing very intimate, which can be distressing when a modest person needs help and may not recognize the helper. Plus, bathing is a complicated process with many steps in a specific order….
Signature strength: calm
Many of us admire people who have the gift of remaining calm. Calm as a signature strength is the ability to respond to threats from a place of appropriate confidence. To remain “centered.” It’s not always easy to achieve. Our bodies react to the stresses of modern life—including family caregiving—with the same fight-or-flight hormones that…